She made me lost.

I was born confused, just stick with me. I want some advice...

Today I was bored and I typed in my girlfriend's username for another site called GAIAonline. The site is 100% for making money and stuff like that... I have grown to hate it. But yeah... actually I am being crazy right now, her username is actually from her myspace; a site I actually love, it keeps me in touch with my friends and it allows me to see how they're doing. Yeah, but I checked her username over google... guess what? I found this website. I FOUND THIS WEBSITE! You don't know how scared I was that I found something she hid from me. She hid it...

My girlfriend wrote that she could be a pedofile... if I wasn't already confused (which I was, no doubt about it) I was undoubtedly more confused then I thought was possible. I found so much material by just typing in her username. How is it possible that internet holds your identity from everyone, but one small thing like this and I know everything she has been doing? I am so lost...

She never puts anything on her myspace. She's so secretive. I always think she's hiding stuff... I couldn't believe she really was. She even has videos online about how much fun she has... she's never THAT energetic around me...

Sometimes I believe she loves me... and sometimes I think she thinks I am a game... a game that she take apart and puts together and take apart again just to leave there, on the floor, in shambles. Pieces! SCRAPS of little cardboard PIECES!

Why is she like this... Can't she trust me? I'm no perfect person either. I could accept anything she is. I love her enough to die for her... If she told me to kill myself... I would.